Kevin Nealon
Accommodator/Apologist/Passive Aggressor
Comedian
http://twitter.com/kevin_nealon
http://www.kevinnealon.com
1224747 followers
717 tweets
kevin_nealon
Manifesto writing paper should not be sold.
kevin_nealon
Manifesto paper should not be sold.
kevin_nealon
Who needs politicians? California could run itself with all the self-help books.
kevin_nealon
Hypochondriac Thought for the Day: did I read that expiration date on the cottage cheese upside down???
kevin_nealon
Great opportunity to see the hilarious Russell Peters (@therealrussellp ) and myself tonight @7pm . Comedy & Magic Club. Hermosa Beach, Ca.
kevin_nealon
Giving your husband the silent treatment is more gift than punishment. (via @kellyoxford )
kevin_nealon
The higher the heel the worse the childhood. (via @WhitneyCummings )
kevin_nealon
Hypochondriac Thought for the Day: Is that sweat dripping down the back of my leg...or blood?
kevin_nealon
Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in, Lohan out, Lohan in,...
kevin_nealon
I don't believe anything a magician says...onstage or off.
kevin_nealon
I think we can safely rule out any guy with hair highlights to be a terrorist. Too much work to turn around and blow himself up.
kevin_nealon
Hahaa! Yes, you're all right, I meant the 'pot' thickens. Oh, and Doug Wilson will return soon. Wait for it...wait for it.
kevin_nealon
Weeds - Episode 2. Tonight. Showtime. The plot thickens.
kevin_nealon
At this point Blagojevich might as well throw his name in the hat as a possible candidate for president of Haiti.
kevin_nealon
Just think of all the millions and millions of people Dr Laura will help by being off the air.
kevin_nealon
Season 6, Weeds...tomorrow.
kevin_nealon
Thanks Philly! You guys laughed in all the right places. Great comedy town!!
kevin_nealon
Just realized this is one of my favorite episodes tonight of Glenn Martin DDS on Nick at Nite at 10:30. @glennmartindds
kevin_nealon
My name is Kevin Nealon but I play Glenn Martin DDS tonight on Nick at Nite, 10:30. Can you guess who plays my wife?
kevin_nealon
Instead of BP paying huge fines couldn't they just fill us all up for free for the next ten years?
kevin_nealon
If you happen to be in Philly and would like some amusement I will be doing stand-up at The Helium Comedy Club. 8/12 thru 8/14
kevin_nealon
It's not too late! Comedy & Magic Club, Hermosa, Ca. - Louie Anderson, Kevin Pollack, Carol Liefer 8/11. For tixs: FriendsofBigJoe.com
kevin_nealon
Rare L.A. appearance for Louie Anderson & Kevin Pollack. This Wed. 8/11 Comedy & Magic Club. Hermosa, Ca. For tixs: FriendsofBigJoe.com
kevin_nealon
Plse come if you can: Comedy & Magic Club, Hermosa, Ca. - Louie Anderson & Kevin Pollack. Hilarious! 8/11. For tixs: FriendsofBigJoe.com
kevin_nealon
Why is it that the samples on the toothpick at the store always taste better than when you get it out of the box at home?
